Skip to main content

Past - The way it is..!!

Holding on to the past is like trying to breathe life into a dead body that has already breath its last. It's the pain to revive it even when you know that it's gone and now all that remain are memories of the times spent together. Curtains down, one act of the play is over. The stage is empty temporarily for new and existing characters to take on their role.

No one is singled out here. We've all had our share of losses but yet how we handle them is what defines the rest of the course of our life.

Not letting go of the past or inability to overcome the past is like being caught in the vortex of the time warp that holds you enmeshed within it but there is no way out unless you wanna remain in the black hole forever or you wanna make an endeavor to step out of it. Its been a year less than a decade since I lost my dad but the mere thought of him or any family moments of get togetherness or any cross roads brings back his flooding memories rife with pain insane. Life has moved on without him, I have changed but the girl child within me continues to hold on to her dad in her continuing life's journey; all this while being unsure if he is even there watching over. Such is the mayhem in my mind..!!

I know it's entrapment and I'm stuck; I'm inflicting pain on me, myself where I've reached a stage of being both the victim and the attacker. It is not voluntarily. Some incidents do happen in our lives where we hold onto the past instead of past holding onto us..!! Why? I am still seeking answers. Is there a way to quantify loss? NO. There isn't any. Can what's gone forever especially death ever come back? NO. Why then do we keep pinning for it that it will someday..?? Replaying his last day to which I was witness to over and over again is an act I've no control on. Was there anyway, I could change that fateful day to make him live a little longer all when he kept saying he wanted to live and there I was helpless unable to do anything. This has been the biggest failure of my life. Come what may, I cannot infuse life into my dad and bring him back. Yet, I feel trapped in this bondage. Why? I have no frigging clue..!!

Life showed me a different facet of life that I was oblivious to all along. What matters, what do not, how people change, how relations change, who sticks through, who understands, what really matters, all of it..!!

But, one thing is absolutely certain you can never completely overcome your past because it surmises the person you've transformed to be today. It is up to you to decide whether to keep the doors of your heart closed to it, live within the boundaries or remain stuck in it.

We can’t put the past on rewind, pause or forward for there are no buttons in life.




Comments

Anonymous said…
God bless him , you , me and every one of us ...
~Abhi

Popular posts from this blog

A Legend Lost. A Legacy Forever.

 On October 9, 2024, India lost one of its most cherished industrialists and humanitarians, Ratan Tata. His last words on social media, " Thank you for thinking of me. " were quintessentially Tata—humble, understated, and full of grace. These parting words have reverberated across the nation, encapsulating the quiet dignity with which he lived and led. In an age where public figures often tower through grand gestures, Ratan Tata’s approach was markedly different. His power was wielded not through public spectacle, but through quiet action, compassionate leadership, and a relentless commitment to integrity. From his role in expanding the Tata Group into a global conglomerate to his advocacy for animal welfare and support for start-ups, Tata's legacy is one of kindness interwoven with visionary business strategy. What set Ratan Tata apart was not just the scope of his achievements, but the human touch he brought to them. Even as he orchestrated some of India’s most signifi...

Compassion and Conviction: Rejecting the Lies of Conformity in Modern Culture

Two false ideas have permeated modern culture. The first is that if you disagree with someone’s lifestyle, you must hate or fear them. The second is that loving someone means agreeing with everything they believe or do. Both of these notions are flawed and have led to unnecessary tension in our relationships. In reality, disagreement often stems not from fear, but from an internal pressure to conform. Society tends to impose an unspoken expectation that if others are living a certain way, you should too. This self-induced pressure to "step up" creates unwarranted stress. It’s not fear of the other person, but rather discomfort with the possibility of being out of sync with societal norms. However, this pressure doesn't need to exist. It's possible to respect someone else's choices while maintaining your own convictions. Disagreeing with someone’s lifestyle doesn’t mean you dislike them - it simply means you're staying true to yourself. On the flip side, love d...

Embracing the Flow of Life

In our fast-paced world, we often try to control the outcomes of every situation. We want things to happen a certain way, on our terms, and according to our timelines. However, there’s a simple yet powerful philosophy that can help us navigate the unpredictability of life with more ease: "If it comes, let it come. If it stays, let it stay. If it goes, let it go." This mantra encourages us to let go of resistance and embrace the natural flow of events. By adopting this mindset, we learn to welcome opportunities without fear, accept stability without clinging to it, and release what no longer serves us without regret. It’s about living in harmony with the inevitable changes life brings, instead of fighting against them. 1. If it comes, let it come. Life often surprises us with new possibilities—whether in the form of relationships, opportunities, or challenges. By letting things come naturally, without forcing or fearing them, we open ourselves up to new experiences and growth....