Thursday, November 25, 2010

Seasons n' Life..!!

It is November and the rains continue to pour in Bombay ever since the onset of the rainy season in June. In the last three decades of my life, I have never seen this happen. Not having had to go through the October heat has been a definite blessing in disguise. The weather is so pleasant, the smell of wet earth, thrilling and the eerie calmness, exciting; words fall short while expressing this splendour of Mother Nature. I can't say this for others but I certainly feel intoxicated with life when I am enveloped in an atmosphere as such! It brings out the child-woman within me who breaks herself free of all worldy bonds and feels one with herself.

If only, we all could live life so peacefully without having to be tied down with materialism, relationships and other worldy sighs. As Ayn Rand, rightfully questioned "So you think that money is the root of all evil. Have you ever asked what is the root of all money?". I am not too sure if there are any real answers to same. Spirituality might come close to throwing some light on it but that is about it. Yet, how many amongst us would stop to ponder about it? We all run behind making money for time is all we have and time means money. Relations are no longer intense, they have become superficial and insignificant. Emotions are farce. Jumping to conclusions at the drop of a hat and taking random decisions have become the order of the day. To sum it all up; it is no longer about being real; it is more about being a survivor. I belong to the latter!

Seasons come and go but emotional upheavals seem to have become a part of my life. There are nights when sleep evades me and darkness engulfs my mind in a myriad of emotions, and then there are days when I wake up either with a strong will determined to make the most of the day and live my life to the fullest or numbed having been paralyzed with grief over the happenings around and the regret to cry. After having had a real intense life in the past; it is kind of real difficult to say that it has not affected me. It certainly has but it is time for me to "Get Up" n' "Move On..!!", once again in life, pulling up my guard and holding experience as my armour.

With a clean swipe of all the fate lines in the palm of my left hand in a freaky accident very recently; I am all set to make my own destiny this time around! It would be a rare few who would have got an opportunity as such and I having recognized it will not let this one pass. I have now learnt to value myself, which means: I will fight to seek my own realm.

I am leaving here with my favorite quote from Robert Frost, "The woods are dark and lovely and deep; I have miles to go before I sleep and miles to go before I sleep..."